📚 Media Journal 🎮

• I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy - 5⭐
• Memoir about growing up as a child star. Her mom was very controlling and encouraged her anorexia/disordered eating. Discusses how skinniness is so encouraged by our society that people are willing to look the other way at child abuse. Also discusses the sexualization and treatment of child stars (she doesn't specifically mention Dan Schneider by name, but she discusses in broad details her time at Nickelodeon). Also touches on grief and how it is irrational and complicated. Very hard read (look up the CW beforehand), but very, very poignant.
• Manhunt by Gretchen Faulkner-Martin - 4⭐
  • Dystopian post-apocalyptic story that envisions a type of virus outbreak that only effects those with XY chromosomes. Framed through a trans woman's lens -- as access to estrogen sources dwindle, the reality of potentially losing your humanity and turning into a feral beast is a terrifyingly real possibility. Really dives deep into TERF-mindsets in this environment, like not accepting and caring for transgender women as sisters even though the alternative would kill BOTH of you. Violent, harsh but unfortunately something that is quite realistically envisioned.
• Heavenly Tyrant by Xiran Jay Zhao - 4.5⭐
  • Second book in the series (first one being Iron Widow). We get to truly live in Zetian's mind now that the initial worldbuilding is done. She remains our problematic fave. It's interesting seeing how she deals with the aftermath of toppling a fascist/imperial regime -- she didn't actually have a plan for what came next. She spends much of the novel imprisoned by Qin Zhen, which is not what she expected. Really loved that she isn't willing to compromise on women's rights, but also learns throughout the story that values can differ for every woman.
• Fevered Star by Rebecca Roanhorse - 5⭐
  • Another second book in a series (the first being Black Sun). God, I just love Rebecca Roanhorse's writing style. The world building is so evocative and the characters are wonderfully flawed and realistic. We get to spend more time with Xiala, who I love probably the most. We see the terrible pain Serapio is going through now that he is host to a dark deity. I must say, the development of Naranpa's character in this book was very good. I didn't really enjoy her character that much in the first book. I don't want to say too much about this one, actually, because I really want to encourage anyone who is a fan of fantasy to give this series a chance.
• Tread of Angels by Rebecca Roanhorse - 5⭐
  • A short (novella?) noir-type story using Christianity as a source of mythology. The main character must prove that her sister is innocent in the murder of an archangel. However, she discoveres that...maybe she doesn't actually know as much about her sister as she thought. The story grapples with what can happen when you build up an idealized version of someone (in this case, a loved one) - how that can make you blind to who they really are. Honestly, I really enjoy any media that uses Christianity as a mythology similar to how Greek, Norse, etc mythology is used. I'm not religious, but I did grow up Catholic and I must admit the aesthetics really go hard.
• The City of Brass by S.A. Chakraborty - 4.5⭐
  • I've always been fascinated by Middle Eastern mythology and culture, so the concept had me hooked right away. I did find Nahri to be a bit unlikeable a lot of the time, but the supporting characters (especially Dara) really are well written enough to help you stay invested in the story. I really want to visit Daevabad so badly (though I guess I wouldn't be allowed :P). Typical story archetype of "what if you found out you were actually the last of a race thought extinct" but it is done well!
• A House with Good Bones by T. Kingfisher - 4.5⭐
  • Great short horror novel. Really chilling premise of a parent that just feels "off". Kind of parallels what can happen when women are simply dubbed "hysterical" with the mom character, as the main character doesn't believe in the haunting at first. Loved that the MC was an entymologist - it added a nice layer of depth. The scenes with the ladybugs and knowing that something was wrong immediately because she clocked that there were no insects of any kind in the rose garden built up the tension. Truly a great use of a character quirk. T. Kingfisher is very talented at creating a sort of palpable dread throughout her stories. My one issue was that the tone did sort of veer on a bit too "goofy" at times (mostly due to the MC's inner monologue at times). But it wasn't enough to take me completely out.
• Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros - 3.5⭐
  • Oh boy, here we go. A BookTok darling. I read this one due to two of my friends just absolutely not shutting the hell up about it. Here's the thing. I love dragons. I can't help that I have been a cringe loser since Dragonlance at like 11. The actual world building and story that is going on in this book is very interesting! But MY GOD is Violet the most unlikeable protagonist I've ever had the displeasure of spending 500ish pages with. Truly despite everything, she made me not want to continue reading this book. The worst part is that it feels like the author doesn't find her unlikeable?? Because she never actually learns from or is humbled by her extreme hypocrisy (getting extremely upset that Xaden didn't sure very dangeroussecrets with her... even though she kept dumb shit from him!!!!). Her friends just seem to more or less roll with it? Also the sex isn't anythign I haven't read (oftentimes more well-written) in fanfic before. But I suppose it's enough to carry the book for normal people who have never read any fanfic in their lives. I will say that at least the side characters are all pretty likeable (Rhi for life). That and the admittedly quite interesting lore is what kept me going (as you'll see, I read all 3 books). Also being able to discuss and then recommend better books to people 🤪
• I'm Laughing Because I'm Crying by Youngmi Mayer - 5⭐
  • Really great memoir by a woman I was just randomly following on Insta for years. She talks about the difficulties growing up as a mixed white/Korean person in South Korea. Not being Korean enough but also not being white enough. The neglect and abuse she experienced in her childhood was really disturbing to read at times. However, since Youngmi is a comedian, everything is told humourously, and it helps a lot to lighten up the mood. But damn was it bleak at times. There are many aspects of her life that I could find myself relating to, but she had a great way of navigating the key differences in her experience that helped me to reflect on myself, my privilege and ultimately how your own personal experiences are shaped by your identity, for better or worse.
• Iron Flame by Rebbeca Yarros - 3.5⭐
  • The second in this series. Again, same issues as Fourth Wing. The lore is keeping me interested but it is 100% despite the literal worst main character of all time (yes this is hyperbole). I guess that means it must be really interesting, right? For me to keep going like this? The sex/makeout scenes in this one are so extremely over the top in this one though. Please tell me why no one ever says anything about them groping, fondling and sucking each others faces in front of even THEIR FAMILY MEMBERS lmao. No one would actually behave this way. The mormonism is truly jumping out of the page here. The Venin lore drops were actually quite good and I am interested in learning more. In my opinion, Violet would have been more realistic as the one to [spoiler], since we have seen that she has zero self control or self awareness lol.
• The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller - 4.5⭐
  • So beautiful. Miller's prose has this wonderful poetic quality that makes it such a pleasure to read. It wasn't strong enough to stop it from dragging a little for me about 2/3 through (around the middle point of the fighting), but overall just a gorgeous retelling. I really enjoy spending time with Miller's characters.
• The Midnight Library by Matt Haig - 3⭐
  • This book could have been so good and poignant. It deals with a woman whose life has spiralled out of control to the point where she decides to end it. From there, she becomes stuck in a sort of limbo (the titular Midnight Library) and has the opportunity to try out alternative life paths. It could have been so good, man. But instead it just is another "see, your life isn't so bad!! Just smile more and you're cured!" type of self help bullshit book. I get it, our lives are actually much better than we realize and it is just the negativity clouding our judgment. But depression isn't logical or rational and it is hard to dig yourself out of that hole. It certainly doesn't happen just by witnessing a life where you're a mother and a wife. Jesus christ lmao just remembering that that is the life where she decides she wants to keep living is pissing me off all over again lmao.
• Legends & Lattes by Travis Baldree - 4⭐
  • Really adorable, super low-stakes fantasy story about a lady orc who opens a coffee shop. Loved the cute details like Gnomes inventing coffee brewing and espresso machines, etc. It takes the typical fantasy conventions and works them into just a super cozy little story. This is definitely one to read if you're feeling stressed and just want something to read while you curl up with a cup of coffee and a comfy blanket.
• Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte - 5⭐
  • What can I say? It's a classic for a reason. You'll also find this one in my "Loves" section. But I decided to reread it after hearing the news about a (questionable, vaguely racist) adaptation coming out by Emerald Fennel. I actually hadn't read this book in about 7 or 8 years (definitely prior to moving to Belgium), which is just crazy. I had forgotten how beautifully written this book is. I mean, no duh, really. But what a joy to read (ironic to say, considering how dreary 3/4 of the book is). This book changed me on a fundamental level the first time I read it in Intro to English Literature in college (lol). It truly has it all: multiple narrators, story-within-a-story, extreme and I mean absolutely unhinged yearning (it's basically the blueprint), unlikeable protagonists, ghosts, redemption, I COULD GO ON!!! God, I know this book is not for everyone. Some struggle with the literally transcribed dialect in the dialogue of some of the characters (Joseph in particular). But my god was this tailor-made for me.
• The Blade Itself by Joe Abercrombie - 3.75⭐
  • Recommended by my husband 😳 I guess Joe Abercrombie is known as like a grimdark writer, but I didn't really get that impression in this book at least. There was some gore of course, but nothing that was what I'd consider extreme. Maybe my threshold has just been killed by my decades of internet useage. Anyways, somehow the like tone of this book reminded me of the 90s fantasy TV shows like Hercules and Xena even though it is NOTHING like them. Just the sort of sandy, gritty look with a humorous tone although it's trying to be serious. Does that make sense??? It's a bit slow paced, but interesting enough that I kept going. Enjoyed many of the characters that we get to acquaint ourselves with throughout the story and especially enjoyed how they were all satisfyingly brought together (more or less) by the end. Say one thing about Nikki, say she loves when that happens in a satisfying way. Since it's the first book in a trilogy, it definitely feels like it's spending time just setting up the world, but the information that is revealed to us is very compelling. I will continue for sure.
• Onyx Storm by Rebecca Yarros - 3.5⭐
  • The foreshadowing in my thoughts on the first book comes to its conclusion. And like dude whatever kinda. These books are so so frustrating to me, because the premise and the lore are interesting! Many of the story beats were good! But once again, as I have been harping on this whole time, that is almost completely for nothing because we have to spend 99% of the book in Violet's head. I will say, it was a relief that she was like 10% more tolerable in this book and due to circumstances there are far fewer boring and repetitive sex scenes. The extra lore we got about the world outside of the Continent was very interesting and fun. I'm intrigued to learn more. But I'm not sure if I have it in me. The extra chapters from other characters' POV were very, very weak. You would not have known it was supposed to be someone else if the chapter heading didn't literally tell you. But I did read all these books so joke's on me!
• The Wander Society by Keri Smith - 3.5⭐
  • Cute book that is basically a little bit of a woo-woo guide to unplugging (essentially) and bringing back the art of the mindless wander. The story (if we can call it that) is framed as the author's investigation into the titular (and fictional)Wander Society. It can get quite pretentious at times (like all new agey "reconnect with your inner child" type books) but ultimately I do feel kinda inspired to try to break out of the rut I've found myself in (even if that just means starting with not taking the exact same route every time I go for a walk 🤪).
• Our Wives Under the Sea by Julia Armfield - 5⭐
  • Beautiful and haunting. Armfield's writing is like poetry and evokes such a true sense unease and "wrongness". One half of the chapters are from the perspective of a woman whose wife is a marine biologist whose latest research trip went horribly wrong. The other half is from the wife's perspective during the dive (documenting in "real time). The sense of dread is just palpable and the poetic nature of the prose gives a truly dreamy (though more nightmare I suppose) feel to the entire story.

• The Legend of Zelda: Echoes of Wisdom - 4⭐
• First playable Zelda and it is quite a cute experience. I do actually like the diorama-esque art style (I know it is hit or miss for people). At first, it was a little difficult to not be able to actually do combat as Zelda (you use your minions instead), but it became pretty intuitive pretty quickly. Loved the accessories system, although I don't think they made too much of a difference. The tactical accessories (such as walking on quicksand, swim speed up, etc) were the ones I used most. Also was great to have different outfits (the one that grants you the ability to speak with cats?? hello???). I found myself using the pajamas the most even though it was kind of funny to think of Zelda just running around in a silk nightie the whole time. I also really enjoyed the return of proper classic Zelda dungeons. After playing this, their absence was noted even more in BOTW/TOTK. The River Zora were present in this one ALONGSIDE the Sea Zora. I found that a cute little way to include them both (I have a fondness for the River Zora style of Zora). ALSO MY BABIES - DEKU SCRUBS!!! True to Nintendo form, the UI was quite tedious to work with (the scroll-to-the-right-for-ages-to-finally-select-what-you-want system seems to be the best design they can come up with? Why?), although it was helped by the addition of a Favourites section. That was added when I was about 3/4 through the game, and it was a noticeable improvement.
• Blue Prince - 4⭐
  • Somehow this game unlocked for me the ability to play first person games lmao. HUH? This one is a puzzle game with random deck builder (rogue-light) eleemtns. The "main goal" is to get to Room 46 in your Uncle's 45-room mansion, but basically the moment you start playing, you realize there is much more to it. I truly enjoyed the first 2/3 of the game. For me, that was around 80-90 hours (I typically took about an hour per in-game day). What helped me, I think, was that I didn't stay lazer focused on just one goal in the beginning (whether just trying to get to Room 46 or solving a particular puzzle). Instead, I would pivot to untangling whatever thread was most applicable to what the RNG threw at me that run. There was enough mystery surrounding several aspects of the early game (what happened to your mom, learning more about your uncle, various family members, and even political history of the in-game world) that I found it easy to keep going just for the tiny bits of lore I could discover. However, the further you go, the less apt you were to finding anything new lore-wise. Instead, you would fine answers or hints to puzzles that I for one had already solved hours ago. Additionally, the last two-ish or three-ish major puzzles (definitely the last two that have been discovered that are hidden behind many doors) were quite extreme and required so much specialized knowledge of ciphers, puzzle types, chess knowledge even! that I had to use a guide. Normally, that wouldn't bother me, but even WITH the guide, I didn't feel like I would have been able to naturally come to the solution myself (normally you see a solution and think "oh duh!"). The RNG really, really hurt in these moments. I feel like it wouldn't have been so frustrating if the game had more late-game RNG mitigation (there are a few things for sure, and they surely helped). All in all though, this game had me firmly gripped and I consider it one of the best games I've ever played.

• Movie 1 - 4⭐
• bleep
• Movie 2 - 4⭐
  • bloop

I probably won't ever do a music section, because I listen to way too much random stuff (based on my mood and also I'd never stop reviewing things if I listed every single new album/single I checked out. I'm not a music reviewer lol). I added this here so you wouldn't have to live with the mystery 😁 I'll eventually add something to the "loves" section with all-time faves.